I saw this on another blog & liked it. Thought I'd share it

Love isn't love unless it is expressed; Caring isn't caring unless the other person knows; Sharing isn't sharing unless the other person is included. Loving, caring and sharing can make for a very happy life.

We're off to the show on the weekend. I'm looking forward to it. I haven't been in years. Of course I'm not looking forward to the financial drain that results, but then, it's only once a year isn't it.

Currently listening to a bootleg of the 1984 Newcastle concert of Robert Plant. I must say, it's bloody good quality for a bootleg. It's how I remember it too. I saw him at Apollo stadium on the same tour. Actually, the bootleg sounds a bit better than I remember it sounding at the Apollo. The accoustics at the Apollo were never that good were they?

Yesterday i finally started listening to a CD I got for my Birthday. Deep Purple; Concerto for Group & Orchestra. It's not everyones cup of tea, but I've always loved it. The quality is amazing, compared to the original vinyl. I was trying to pinpoint why I liked it so much and found it difficult. I did come up with a few theories that certainly contribute though. I like both Rock & classical & its a good combination of the two. In a way, I find it 'balances' my mood and frame of mind when I listen to it. i used to listen to it a fair bit during a period when I was about 16 when I think I must have been reasonably happy with life. Also, I used to listen to it with my Brother. His girlfriend hated it & she was somewhat jealous of me & the time Simon spent with me. So it kinda represents that bond we have. Anyway, I like it.

My sleep during the last week has been punctuated with bizarre dreams/nightmares. These have occurred on a nightly basis. They are quite detailed & feel very real, despite the fact that they don't make any sense at all. They have included the following scenarios:

• Someone walking into the bedroom while I am in bed holding Mandrake, my cat that went missing over a year ago. Doesn't sound very bizarre i know, but the person who was holding Mandrake is the last person I'd want to be dreaming about. Even moreso than my ex-husband.
• speaking of which, he's been in several dreams. I usually end up feeling very stressed, frustrated and annoyed, which is largely how he made me feel. I have no idea why he keeps popping up in my dreams.
• An antique shop containing an old lady, an old car with dead bodies hidden in it and some cows. What the?????
• My Dad dissappearing. It's OK, he went off to the country for some peace & quiet - but didn't tell anyone. The dream involved looking for him

Last nights was something about diving & not having the correct skin-tight costume for it. Bizarre!!!!!

I'm now off to trawl the net looking for inspiration...

Have fun & be good

I pinched this from Pookie. Let's see how good you are. Then Check out the Scoreboard!

I've only had one cuppa so far so this will probably be full of errors etc.....

Well, I've only got one week to go of holidays & then it's back to work suposedly refreshed. Actually, I DO feel somewhat refreshed. This holiday I have not done much of anything and that is just how I wanted it. Some of that was because I was sick for a lot of it & didn't have too much energy but the rest of it was because I normally start a holiday with a huge list of things to do. What usually happens is that I only achieve a third to half of the list & go back to work tired and frustrated. That's because I put too much on the bloody list & don't really have a hope in hell of achieving it all. This time I didn't have a list, well, only a little one, and it's all done.

Catching up with a girlfriend on Sunday whom I haven't seen in quite a while. I have finally convinced her to make a Dr's appointment to have a Pap Smear. She's never had one before. she's 27. Naughty girl. I know they are not nice, but they are essential!!

In the last year or so I've been trying al sorts of sample face & eye creams etc... Guess which one I think is the best for wrinkle minimisation? A cheap hand cream - Rosken Dry Skin Cream in the white tube/bottle. I kid you not, it was the most effective. Appears to be ok for sensitive skin as mine often is. Who says we have to have all of these expensive concoctions? After all, my Nanna didn't. She just used soap & water (rain-never tap) and whatever moisturiser she had around. She ALWAYS looked 10-15 years younger than she was. If it's good enough for her, it's good enough for me.

I made a statement in my blog the other day which unfortunately was misconstrued. I seem to have a habit of doing this. Easy to do when you know exactly what you mean in your own head, but only type an abreviated version of it. I think the problem lay with the interpretation of the word 'then'- in terms of when exactly 'then' was. I think 'then' was interpreted as a later period than the time-fame that was in my head at the time. Confused? Yep, thought you might be.

It's such a gorgeous day today, but I have no idea what to do. Any suggestions?

I recently asked a friend of mine if he had found the love of his life. He said he regretted to inform me that no, he hadn't, but that he had found an entire cast for a remake of One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest!

In fact, several of my male net-friends have said similar things. That most of the women they came across were psycho, total liars, scheming witches or variations/combinations thereof. 'They couldn't possibly be that bad' I retorted. Well, I now concede that they probably were. I don't claim to be the most sane person on the planet, but I know that personally I have had enough women wreak havoc in my life this year to last a lifetime, so I shouldn't be surprised when another one rears her fucking head should I?

Why do people thinks it's perfectly ok to play games with other peoples lives?

I just wish they'd all just fuck off. As it is I can't listen to Bowie anymore without getting angry or upset or both. Before you know it, the only thing I'll be able to listen to without any adverse time/place/person/event association, is the bloody Wiggles!

I'm not having any more birthdays. No, not because of the obvious 'age' related issues, but because it appears that I have begun a tradition. Last year on my birthday I developed a migraine halfway through a film friends took me to see (the Italian Job). I barely made it through without throwing up, but managed to do that on the way home. How embarassing. Migraines had never caused me to throw up previously. I'd had a nice night planned of dinner with a good friend but ended up spending it in bed drinking cups of tea. Well, guess what happened yesterday? Yep, another migraine! Fortunately it waited until the end of a good day to come on, but it did spoil plans I had for later that evening *wink*. I went to bed, alone, and slept for 12 hours. So, next year, I'm not having a birthday, or I'll have it on a different day.

Before the onset of the migraine though, the day was a good one. We met the rest of my family at Strathalbyn for lunch at the Victoria Hotel Bistro. The food was lovely, but true to another of my traditions, they stuffed up my order & I got mine last. I got a free desert though, complete with sparklers. Damn, I thought my request for no birthday cake would get me out of the embarassing public 'happy birthday' singing. We then all wandered around the town like a pack of stray sheep looking at this and that. Mostly overpriced stuff due to it being the weekend of the Antique & collectibles fair. We did find a few things, but I didn't find anything I 'had to have', unless you count the black ostrich feather I got for $5 which normally cost a small fortune. I have an antique glass inkwell I want it for as the other feather quill I had broke. Of course, feathers have other uses too *wink*.

After the headache/vomiting/sleep routine yesterday, we decided to head down there again today as the trash & treasure market was on in the morning. We scoured that & then looked at what we missed yesterday & sat by the river for a while. The weather was just perfect, but all the ducks have gone missing. I remember when Strath was teeming with ducks. I only saw the one the whole weekend!

We came back via Melba's chocolate factory. I know, we had to detour a bit for that, but it was worth it. We have a stash that should last the week at least.

Now that the weather is nicer, we hit the balcony with cups of tea in hand to relax. It's been an enjoyable weekend for the most part.

It's my birthday tomorrow. Another year older. Ugh!!! Hopefully the next year will be better than the last was, for the most part anyway.

An unexpected email I received this week has led me to reflect on some of the decisions I have made. Particularly a fairly significant one in terms of the future. Whilst I thought it might spark feelings of regret and a sense of having made the wrong choice, it's actually done the opposite. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I made the right decision, regardless of the pain that doing so has brought me. Had I known then what I know now, I would have definately made that wrong choice, and I imagine that at this point in time, I probably would have moved on from that relationship out of sheer boredom. Instead, I'm looking forward to travelling, creating things, achieving success both professionally and personally, and sharing all that with someone whom I think, and have always thought, was pretty special.

I know now that in the past some of my actions may have precipitated events that have subsequently caused me a significant amount of angst. I'm not entirely sure why I did that. The goal posts weren't where I thought they were so my actions were never likely to result in a positive outcome, if that was in fact my intent at the time. I dunno. I've been pretty screwed up at times & I think that for much of the last year I have been my own worst enemy. Time to put all that to bed & enjoy the future. Isn't that what they say? Enjoy each day as if it is your last? Wise advice. Very wise.

Anyone have any idea how to train a (stupid) cat. Yes, I admit it, Merlin isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he seems to insist on doing things that piss everyone off. Every morning I get a run down on what he has done before I have dragged my sorry arse out of bed. None of it's good. He'll be no good for the chinese take-away though as he has stopped eating & has lost a heap of weight. We'll get there............eventually.

A beautiful day...time to get out in it

This will be as boring as all hell no doubt, because quite frankly, I can't be bothered. It feels as if the only things that have been happening of late have been depressing and/or the cause of a significant amount of angst, and I'd rather not talk about them. What's done is done.

I'm thinking of changing my hair colour. People might kill for naturally curly hair, but I'm having too many 'bad 80's hair' days. I suppose that's what I get for wanting to keep it long & all one length - more or less. I'm thinking of going lighter. No, not blonde. Been there, done that & well, there are a few to inspire me NOT to be blonde. The colour I'm looking for is the colour of the lighter haired of the three in Charmed. I don't watch the show, so don't know her name. What do you think? Should I be brave & just do it?

Another thing I'm considering is a long-standing offer from a net-mate who is a photographer to take a series of photo's of me. I hate being photographed at the best of times, but as he's a bit of a wizz with digital format & post-shoot 'enhancement', I'm giving it serious consideration. After all, I'm not getting any younger. Think I should?

I hate being asked what I want for my birthday. I used to be really practical and keep a list of things I wanted in a notebook. Not specifically for gifts, but things I wanted to buy in general - some personal, some practical. It was useful for such times. I've let this habit lapse in the last year or so and as a result am now in a bit of a quandry. Also because all my priorities have changed & regular 'Lyndal type stuff' seems to be no longer appropriate. I'm also feeling somewhat selfish because, for the first time in years, I don't want anything practical. Bring on the mushy & sentimental crap I say! Even so, I still have no idea really what I would like. Any suggestions?

Merlin is in the bad books......again. I finally got him to sleep outside without too much resistance but the other night, no doubt around 4am, he decided to rip a bloody great big hole in the flywire door. Brilliant. He's never done such a thing before. It's as if some other cat has taken his place. He's not behaving at all like the Merlin I know. He'll settle in eventually I hope.

Off to whip up something for dinner. Ciao xx

Lately there has been no shortage of wake-up calls to remind me that life is too short and that we should live each day as if it is our last. Yesterday, we received news that a relative had attempted to comit suicide. it's something the general public don't see the extent of, because it's rarely in the media, but I see them , all too often, at work. Although, like many others, I have thought about it myself, I've never really been able to understand how things can get, or appear to get so bad that suicide is the preferable option. It's such a waste. It has left us feeling very sombre & melancholy.

I have been adding things to my '100+ Things' page. You'll notice that my 6'2" PC gremlin has also been adding some on my behalf - I think you will be able to pick which ones.

Had lunch with my Brother today which was good. We used to do it regularly when I worked in town. We both miss it. We talked about all sorts of things. His marital situation which is somewhat dodgy at the moment was the main topic. I also told him of a fairly significant event that occurred to me a couple of months ago that I hadn't had a chance to tell him about privately. He thought it explained a fair bit about how I have been in the last few months. It's only a partial explanation though, I didn't fill him in on the rest of the crap - he might have had me comitted to Glenside! We also did some shopping for someone's impending birthday. Haven't made any decisions as yet as to what to get. And no, I'm not giving any hints.

Almost finished another restoration project which will be a Christmas present for someone special. Can't wait to see her face when she opens it. I think I should go into business, but it's hard to put a value on such things and the time they take, especially when you really enjoy doing it.

I'm off to do something productive, if I can get my brain to work properly

I'm now into my third week with this cold. I was getting better there for a while, then I relapsed. It's really giving me the shits because I'm so tired all the time. Thank god for codral cold tablets.

There's lots I want to get done this week. So far my list is as follows;

• Make an appointment to see my Ear, Nose & Throat specialist. It's the least I can do to try & curb my snoring
• Send a copy of my Certificate of Change of Name to my Super fund....albeit 2 years late
• Return Davids' call from the other day & send him an Engagement Card (also belated)
• Catch up with a friend whose birthday it is tomorrow
• Have lunch with my brother Simon
• Go shopping for birthday presents
• Add to my growing Beer Can collection to cover all the pelmets in Adelaide
• Build a Beer Bottle Drive Way - long necks only
• Ignore the above two items - maybe I won't go shopping for birthday presents...hmmmmm
• Get Merlin to spend more time outside
• Put the rego sticker on my car
• Make an apology to someone I accused of making me feel like an unpaid prostitute. I allowed myself to feel that way. In the grand scheme of things, it was nothing. At least I knew where I stood, I knew the score and I was under no illusions. Can't blame him for my self-inflicted punishment being effective.
• listen to lots of different music now that I have my new CD player in the car
• Have someone look at my rear tyre that keeps going flat
• Chuck the Fuzzy Little Bastard off the balcony. Twice. In one day

Ok, I've been called to dinner - Chilli - YUM!!!!!!

xxx

'Sweeny Todd Medical & Sanitary Waste Disposal Services'. I kid you not, I saw this in a Ladies loo of a service station on the way to Melbourne.

Fill you in on more later.....